4. Dancing: Who’s dancing and why are they tapping those toes?
People always say they like to dance on their own, but they’re embarrassed in front of other people. I’m the opposite. When I’m out, drunk or sober, I find dancing so easy – I just flow into it. And I feel like I’m good at it, too. But when I’m on my own, something happens. My limbs become creaky and suddenly I’m self-conscious, even though there’s no one else in the room. I don’t know why I find it easier to let go in a crowd than I do when I’m by myself. I always think of films, of the teenage boy doing air guitar in his room, going crazy because no one’s watching. But it’s when I’m on my own that I’m paranoid of someone watching, even though I know there’s no one there.
I hope that one day I’ll be able to just let go, and it will be as easy and as natural as it feels when I’m out dancing with my friends.
© Kate Warren and Rebuild Expand, 2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Kate Warren and Rebuild Expand with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.